Hi there,
First of all, Happy Valentine's Day.
Whether you are spending today with a partner, with friends, or enjoying your own company, I hope you treat yourself with kindness.
In the spirit of relationships, I want to talk about the most complicated relationship you probably have: The one with your own passions.
In Part 3, we talked about deep focus. But whenever I tell M-Shaped people to focus on one thing, they panic.
They ask:
"But if I focus on Coding for 6 months, won't I lose my ability to Write? Won’t I forget how to Paint? Do I have to break up with my old self to build a new one?"
This is the Fear of Decay. You feel like if you aren't doing everything right now, you are losing everything.
The Science: Myelin Doesn't Just "Vanish"
Good news: Your brain is stickier than you think.
When you learn a skill deeply, your brain wraps those neural pathways in a substance called Myelin. Think of Myelin like the rubber insulation on a wire it makes the signal travel faster and stronger.
Myelin is durable. It does not disappear overnight.
If you spent 3 years learning to play the guitar, and then you stop for 6 months to focus on business, you do not go back to Zero. You might get "rusty," but the neural architecture remains.
The Solution: The "Simmer Pot" Strategy
You don't need to "break up" with your old hobbies. You just need to move them to the back burner.
Think of your life like a 4-burner stove:
The Front Burner (High Heat): This is your Current Season. (e.g., Learning Python). You give this 80% of your energy.
The Back Burner (Simmer): These are your Past Seasons. (e.g., Playing Guitar, Painting).
The Rule: You don't turn the back burners off. You just turn them down to Low.
Front Burner: I code every morning for 60 minutes to 2 hours.
Back Burner: I pick up my guitar once a week for 20 minutes. Or I just listen to music theory podcasts while I drive.
This is the "Simmer."
It is just enough heat to keep the Myelin alive, but low enough that it doesn't steal energy from your main goal.
The Valentine's Lesson
Today, show some love to your "Back Burner" selves.
You aren't abandoning the Artist in you just because you are currently the Engineer. You are simply letting the Artist rest. They will be there when you are ready to rotate the pot again.
You are not a series of failed ex-lovers. You are a complete family of skills waiting for their turn to speak.
In the final part of this series next week, we will bring it all together. We are going to talk about Social Friction, how to explain your constant changes to people who just don't get it.
Love your complexity today.
Jason Chris.